Doctors and The One Night Stand.

Sorry....Soooorry. It's been a while, but for good reason, which I choose not to make up divulge at this time.

I'm in the process of picking out a doctor. It's hard. I equate it to either having a one night stand, or a long lasting relationship, only brought to an end due to distance, death, or change of insurance. So as you can see, it's just like dating.

I've spent some time asking around, speaking to other doctor friends of mine, and researching and I have come up with following conclusion:

You just gotta risk it. The names in the book don't do any good. Asking around? Balls. It's about as helpful as eBay feedback.

I haven't seen a doctor in several years. Something I regret, because I can't say that I've been taking care of the ol' chassis. Years of cola, cheesesteaks, Gray's Papaya, Chinese fast food and insomnia, while not clinically proven to be a dangerous combination, have certainly had an effect on this King Tubby.

I figure that a trip to the family physician will give me an idea of two important factors. First, how much damage have I done. I assume that the bastion of high fat - high sodium - low nutrient - low quality fuel I've been putting into my body will have some adverse effect, I just want to see just how bad.

Second? What can I do to fix it. Of course (s)he'll say "Eat Better", "Excercise", "Think more about what you do, both culinarily and physically, but don't forget environmentally." Fair enough. But what else can I do? How else can I cut this snake of glut off at the head? Spiritually? Metaphysically? Existentially?

That's why I have carefully chosen my doctor. I will certainly let you know how it goes. His name is Shaman Qu'jilou and his offices* are on 95th and Park.

*And by "offices" I mean the cardboard box where he hangs shrunken heads to ward off the evil spirits and medical malpractice attorneys.

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